Dearest Sesame Butter

You've been so good to me these past few years. And now the Body Shop has discontinued you, replacing you with Almond Butter.

I will make an effort to purchase you every time I walk past a Body Shop. Then we can be together if not forever, then for a very long time.

What I wouldn't give/do for a replicator.

I suppose I could learn some science, apply for a job with the company and infiltrate the labs to get the recipe for your heavenly scent. I was fired from the downtown Kingston Body Shop in 1998, after working one shift. According to Perky Kelly the Manager with teased bangs, I just didn't seem to be having fun. I kind of spaced out while she gave me the spiel... I found her frosty pink lip gloss distracting.

L: but that was before my restaurant days -- i don't think i could ever go back to retail
J: I've never done it. I could only sell something I really thought people should have, I think
L: like bacon
J: or porn
L: definitely
J: bacon and/or porn
L: bacon porn
J: mmm greezy
L: greazy, even
it'd be like the tastiest lube ever... and I really can't stop thinking about penis wrapped in bacon... and how much that might hurt.
L: you mean if the bacon was just off the griddle?
J: ouch ouch ouch.


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